Newcastle United; This is the road to relegation

Lofty ambitions, second-from-bottom in October; this is the road to relegation.

Eyeing up the cups, just the third round in both; this is the road to relegation.

Dumped from the second tier, a boss no good up here; this is the road to relegation.

No points at Sunderland, the difference come May; this is the road to relegation.

The captain’s gone missing, he’s no Alan Shearer; this is the road to relegation.

A young battering ram forward, carrying the hopes of a city; this is the road to relegation.

Supposed Camp Nou players, looking up “Ashton Gate”; this is the road to relegation.

Stars seeking moves, to clubs who won’t stand for this; this is the road to relegation.

A big name called in, with no time left; this is the road to relegation.

Some discipline at last, not popular with all; this is the road to relegation.

The biggest derby in years, a 1-1 draw; this is the road to relegation.

A flame-haired midfielder, misfiring at left-back; this is the road to relegation.

The owner’s talking, please shut up; this is the road to relegation.

A former hero in court, the club stand accused; this is the road to relegation.

Going to the last day, and a horrible final fixture; this is the road to relegation.

It’s 2009, it’s 2016; this is the road to relegation.